Have you heard it today? A simply noun and only three letters, yet those two constenents and one vowel strike musical chords. You did buy it not could you even if you last names was Gates or Jobs. This lovely title was given to me eleven years ago. I dreamed of what it would be like and how it would feel the moment I heard my new title, "DAD!" Do we share this title of responsibility, eternal happiness, a connection into the realm many nicknamed, parenthood? Well, welcome to the club!
Yes, back in the blessed year of 2004 our son was born! To be precise which I love to be, it was at 4:44 p.m. Mountain Standard Time on April 4, 2004 on the fourth floor of the hospital. Wow, right? A man in his fourties forgets many an event and far too many things. The birth of a child is the rare, unique memory enscribed in both short & long-term memories. As I close my eyes I see the birth room, I hear the sounds, recalling the cleanliness and all smells that go along. As the doctor announced the birth time I hesitated, and the corrected him, "excuse me, I believe the clock read 4:44 and not 4:43 p.m." Since I now had the calling of dad my voice carried a much higher authoritative tone (even though it was still high-piched for a thirty-year-old man.
When someone is given, no, when someone earns a calling and title of mom or dad their life changed forever! There is the point of no return at that very second of birth and the eternal bond created among the child, mom, and dad. Through 2004, 2005 life began with a new meaning of normality. Excited adventures passed me by as I struggled to keep pace with the copious books and life experiences. Fortunately and by choice another was always their watching my back. In a moments notice she was my pinch-hitter always ready run in my place. My wife, our son's "MOM" was the true C.E.O. of the family and most days I truly followed her lead!
June, 2004 - On My Own
There are days and hours; there are hours which feel like days. That spring Saturday afternoon when mom left the house with my mother-in-law for nearly five hours, ugh! Okay, not so much an ugh when the honest version is told. When the two moms returned home the first phrase that my wife uttered was, "are you kidding me?" Why would she say such strong words? It was because when she left the babe was asleep; hours later, yeah, still asleep! The next time I was not so lucky and the word dad took on a new meaning and one gray hair. A dad or mom is a nurturer, teacher, parent, friend, enforcer of rules, and an entertainer. The early years provided much acting as a funny man.
2005 - When will he say it?
Without expectations there can be little disappointment. Without hope there can be few expectations. I was hoping to hear his voice. Months went by and my hope transformed to concern. Concern turned to prayer and talks with mom or family. And then... the dreaded doctors visit with a specialist of whom I hope is now retired. 2006 was a heavy year with the news, at least back then it felt weighty on my shoulders. Post eleven years of experience it was a ten-pound backpack I could have ran a marathon with and smiled each mile!
2006 - February
Another boy in the house brought double the joy, much laughter, and more meaning to parenthood and partnerships. Was he going to like his older brother? No, I could not think that and I never did again. Before my calling began I promised myself never to say nor think, "why can't you be more like...?" As a dad I must remain impartial and transfer judgment aside. Every son and daughter is differently unique for a reason. They all have hopes, dreams, creativity, and talents, awesome talents to discover with their family's help.
2007 - more waiting for d-a-d
2008 - more classes, more specialized teaching and therapy
2008 - Christmas
He learned to spell, type, and read all on his own time. His vocabulary continues to grow even today at near record speeds. When would I hear his voice? I simply needed to listen with something else than my big hears. You see words are not only spoken, but also they are heard. My son was speaking to me through his gorgeous smile, those warm hugs, laughter, and the long gazes. For those first four years I forgot about worry and meeting educational benchmarks; I just wanted a happy son! Yes, he was happy and if he talks one day, great, if not his other meduliums of communication sufficed.
2009- January
I remember "hi" and the simply question, what is your name? And his response was... "LOGAN!" An amazing year 2009 was along with the six that followed. When a child has thousands of words running through their brain and not yet an outlet for expressing, yeah, it was poetic waterfalls of talking. Patience was required for often a child speaks on different trains of thoughts than an adult (mom or dad) is able to see. As experiences are gained the trains of thinking began to show themselves more clearly to all family members. It was our own language we were all blessed to learn.
2010 - Public Schools
I was scared the first day the bus carted his away to some larger-than-life building. Would they or could they care for him as he needed? Yeah, I still as the same questions! He memorized the names of all teachers, peers, bus drivers, and the bus technicians. His memory astonishes me today and the ability he has to quick relate activities or events.
2015 - Dad & Son
I am a dad, a son, a husband, brother, an uncle, and member of far too many organizations. Being a dad is the calling I chose and still choose today. With my other calling as husband worn my wife and family I will be able to accomplish the goals, crush the obstacles in our path, and find the loving patience my sons and daughter need. Their time is now and I need them as much as they need me.
Step One- show up
Step Two- lift up each other
Step Three- watch for opportunistic events
Step Four- love one another unconditionally
Step Five- family comes first
Step Six- laughter is a must
Step Seven- sacrifice is tough without prayer
Step Eight- hugs and hand holding bring smiles
Step Nine- never give up, ask for help
Step Ten- repeat all previous steps for I am a dad and I can do this with my fabulous family!
Love,
Dad
